Dec 2, 2011

The Entire Stupidity that is the Gay Marriage Debate

 I'm pissed off that I even have to do this post. Because if the damn Legislators we have in Nigeria actually focused on their real job, which is addressing the concerns of Nigerians, I wouldn't be here talking shit about gay people. You and I know that in the whole of Nigeria, NO ONE is concerned about gay people. Even gay people don't give a shit about other gay people. No lie, I asked my gay cousin and he confirmed. Like if one gay person catches another gay person giving him 'the eye' in a public place, he/she looks away FAST. Nigerian gay people are citizens of the closet. Like their closets got 12 bedrooms and a basement and they dont like sunlight too much. They stay hidden. They gotta get a passport and visa to go visit another gay person in his own closet. I don't even know how they manage to remain gay cos I can tell you, you probably need to be CIA to find another gay person to hook up with. Unless they have a secret gay telepathy network that yours truly does not know about cos honestly I can count the number of gay people I knew in all the years I spent in Nigeria. So the talk of even getting married to another gay person is out of the picture and the picture frame. It is the last thing a gay person wants to do, like right after he has crossed off getting old as shit, buying a coffin and entering the ground. Getting married to the same sex comes right under 'DIE' in a gay person's to do list. So why do our legislators feel that the best way to spend their idle national assembly chat time is to gather round and re-prohibit what the whole society has already prohibited? I dont know. Like its so unnecessary, its like the fishes elders council forbidding any fish from using blow dryer on their hair. Yea fish dont have hair, they cant get dry inside get the point. You can't ban people from doing what they weren't doing anyway. Except in Nigeria. You can do anything in Nigeria. Like, rewrite history for instance.

Which is what some people have done with this gay debate.Am talking about those folks saying that homosexuality/same sex marriage was condoned in Igbo land in the past. Thats that bull. Its one thing to be against a bill that clearly comes from an unnecessary place. No one needs to be making laws in Abuja regulating the in and outs of another man's anus. True. And we have a million and fifty two other more pressing things. But can you stop telling me that in traditional Igbo society, they allowed homosexual couples to marry. That is what you start saying when your head has got stuck in a Columbus cloud and you start studying your own history like you are Indiana Jones. Same sex marriage in Igbo society does not in any way, form, context and meaning resemble the same sex marriage that this half-assed bill was made to criminalize. Im not even going to go through all the details of how different they are, cos that's a whole other post entirely. Do some research, and by that I don't mean someone's blog. You're better off axing your father.
    I don't doubt that Nigerians are homophobic. I grew up in Nigeria and I was very homophobic, like I thought gay people were weirdos and shit. It took America to humanize them a bit for me, so now even though I don't still condone it, I let them be. But let's be real, it took a lot for the West to get where they are as far as being tolerant of gays are concerned. Like I read a bit of its history, its like 'blame game' come alive. Apparently, the Brits say the Normans brought it to the British Isles and it wasnt part of their society.Normans say the French started it, the French said it was the Italians, Bulgarians and North Africans, the Italians say it was the last two, the Bulgarians said it was a Sudanese thing, the Sudanese said it was from the Bantus, and i dont know who the Bantus blamed it on, I think Nubians. By the way, most of all the last three were black African ethnicities.
What am saying is that we have been in denial as a whole race about where this gay thing started from. Obviously its a natural thing, but God forbid we accept that. It gotta be the 'other' folks who started it. So when Nigerians lawmakers try to prevent nature from taking its course and instead cast homosexuality as something the 'West' brought, they are only continuing the legacy. And if you want to call them out on it, dont use some 'it was accepted in the past' defense. It was not. Igbo society in the past would kill you dead with a matchet if you were caught having homo sex, and thats the Jesus truth. So if we want to change that, let's tell them that we have, in our times, realized that nature is nature, people are naturally gay, and we need to let them be.
Thats all I'm saying.